Moving Day

We moved Caitlyn down to SUU on Saturday, August 26th.  She worked until Friday so we had a lot to do and prepare on Friday.  Us girls went to Walmart to get all the groceries that we could because I knew the Walmart in Cedar City would be crazy the next day. Caitlyn was very grateful that we paid for this giant shopping trip to get her started. 

Caitlyn had a ton of anxiety about moving and especially about leaving work and her friends there.  She was very stressed and overwhelmed and didn't sleep much leading up to the move.  It breaks my heart to see her so anxious and not be able to fix it for her. I'm amazed by her strength and her willingness to do hard things.  She is so brave! She came with me and Keith to Jonah's football game on Friday night.  It was fun to have her with us.  

When we got home from the game we finished packing up and put everything in the living room so it was ready to go in the morning.  It was hard for me to see her all packed up and realized the time had come and this was actually happening. 

Hallee was feeling so sad about Caitlyn leaving.  They decided to make bracelets with each other's initials on them.  

Wyatt decided not to come because he had a cold and wasn't feeling great.  Watching Caitlyn and Wyatt say goodbye was hard.

Hallee was excited to ride with Caitlyn in her car.  Keith and I drove in the van.  We could tell Caitlyn was getting tired so I drove her car for the last hour.  Poor girl, she is always exhausted because she doesn't sleep well at night when she is anxious. We realized that one of her tires was low and it was the second time that happened so we pulled off in Beaver and went to Big O.  She just bought her tires a couple of months ago so they were able to fix it for us for free.  Thankfully they got us right in and it didn't set us back too much.

We got to the apartment and there was no parking anywhere, it was packed.  We found a space that was a bit of a walk and then we had to walk up three flights of stairs each time to her apartment. Luckily she didn't have a ton of stuff, but it was tiring and when some guys offered to help, Keith took them up on it and they had all the stuff up there really quick.  We were so grateful.  Keith sent them back down to help Mel and Amarie with her stuff.  We were all so grateful for the help.

Caitlyn bought some cute decorations for her room.  Hallee helped Caitlyn with the decorations while I unloaded things. 

They did a great job and her room looked so cute. Hallee loved helping her.

We took some pictures before we all went to Walmart to get more groceries. 

They have a great set up.  Amarie and Caitlyn share a room and a bathroom.  The bathroom is in their room.  There are four other rooms and bathrooms in the apartment so there are ten girls total in the apartment.  There is 5 pantries and 2 fridges so we didn't have a problem with space. They have a beautiful view of the the red rock mountains out their window.

We snapped quick picture of the two of them outside their building.  It was very hot and sunny that day.  

After we got her settled we went to Walmart.  A lady asked us to take her wheelchair back into the store for her while we were walking in. Caitlyn and I had a good laugh watching Keith ride on it and took pictures.  I told Caitlyn that this picture shows that Keith and I should not be the moving crew, ha!

After we put the groceries away we went to Cafe Rio for dinner. Caitlyn's anxiety was rising and she was feeling sick.  Not only does she not sleep when she has anxiety, but she feels sick to her stomach so it's very hard for her to eat.  She calmed herself down and was able to eat.  

After that it was time to say goodbye.  Hallee said goodbye first and started crying and that was when I lost it.  I was ugly crying after that and couldn't stop.

Caitlyn went into fix-it mode and started comforting me and Hallee. 

I knew saying goodbye would be hard, but oh my goodness, it was brutal.  How do I say goodbye to my daughter who has been with me every day for the last eighteen years?  How do I leave her there and wonder all day and night if she is doing okay? How do I accept that we have reached a phase of life where we don't all live in the same house? How do I accept that all my kids aren't safe in their beds in my home every night? It's rough!

Mel and Amarie beat us shopping and at dinner so Mel had already said goodbye and left.  Amarie was so sweet and went into the bathroom so we could say our goodbyes.  Keith was the steady, wise father who told Caitlyn how proud he was of her and how amazing she was going to do, while I cried my eyes out.  We had one last group hug and then we had to go. I'm crying just writing about it!

Caitlyn handled the goodbye much better than expected. I think she had her worst anxiety leading up to it and then she was busy comforting me and Hallee.  She was ready, I knew it and she knew it.  I gave her one last hug at the door.  I texted her a few times on the way home and asked her if she was okay and if she wanted us to come back.  Luckily she is wise and brave and helped me know that she was going to be okay.

Caitlyn sent me a picture of her and Amarie cleaning their bathroom that night. They are two peas in a pod, only those two would spend their first night cleaning their clean bathroom.

I'm so grateful that these two are doing this together.  They are both nervous and scared, but so grateful to have each other.  

On Sunday we facetimed Caitlyn and it was so good to see her smiling.  She was still doing well, but she said talking to us made her home sick.  That was when I realized that I needed to give her some space and let her adjust.  I still text her too much, but I'm getting better.  She has texted or called me a few times very homesick, discouraged and overwhelmed and it is so hard not to panic.  Those times seem to pass and she is okay again.  It will definitely take some time to adjust. I just keep trying to reassure her and let her know that it will get easier, for both of us!

They had a lot of activities and Freshman orientation on Monday and Tuesday and then classes started Wednesday. Caitlyn enjoys school so she is enjoying her classes. They like their roommates and have had fun spending time with them.  

Mel and I drove out there yesterday to bring the girls everything they forgot.  We are both worried about them and were excited to see them. It was so great to see Caitlyn and get a big hug from her. We took them shopping and to lunch and then headed home.

Caitlyn showed me how she was using the Tupperware we got her. It hit home again that she is all grown up and on her own! I'm so proud of her and I miss her like crazy. She reaches out to me when she is struggling so I worry a lot, but it was good to see her and realize that she is doing okay and the good stuff is outweighing the bad stuff, she just doesn't always tell me about the good stuff.  This transition has been very hard on her, especially with her anxiety, but she is doing it and I think it's getting better every day.