Viewing

On Sunday we all gathered at Dad's to plan the funeral.  We called Gary and we were able to work together to write a beautiful obituary and plan the funeral service. Sharon Beck brought us dinner.  It was so nice to not have to worry about food.  The next day Kathy Fullmer came over and brought us fruit and vegetables. Everyone is so kind and loves mom and dad so much. On Monday we went and cleaned out mom's room.  It was hard to see her empty bed. It was so hard to go visit her there, but I'm sure going to miss it. After that dad and Mel went to the mortuary and finalized everything. On Tuesday we didn't have anything that needed to be done so I was able to get yard work done. It was nice to do something physical and that helped me get my thoughts together for my talk.  Matt, Tiff and I met at Leatherby's for lunch.  I'm sure the waitress wondered why we all kept crying.  After that I was able to write my talk and then I made a nice dinner for my family.  We waited until Keith got home and had a late dinner. It was nice to have that time together. Life has been crazy lately and I've been gone a lot. My family has been so supportive of me spending as much time as I can with mom over the last year. 

On Wednesday Mel, Tiff and I dressed mom in her temple clothes. It was hard to see her body, she looked so different.  It was special to get her dressed. I love any chance I get to serve my mom, she has done so much for me.  We found tissues and cough drop wrappers in mom's dress pocket. I remembered one of the last times I went to the temple with mom.  Mom was constantly eating cough drops and dad and the doctor wanted her to start eating mints instead, they were worried about how many cough drops she was eating. She didn't like the mints or candy as much as the cough drops. We were in the temple and she realized she had a cough drop in her pocket, she looked over at dad and quickly put the cough drop in her mouth. It was so funny.  It was so out of character for mom to be defiant, but the disease caused this weird parent/child dynamic between mom and dad. It was really sad, but there were some times that it was really funny. 

Wednesday night was the viewing. I went down early and went to dad's and had some time to see Lori and Elena. We went to the church early to get everything set up.  So many people sent beautiful flowers.  The picture we used for the obituary blew up great. Mom is so beautiful with the best smile.

Dad picked out pictures and they looked great on the table.  

Keith brought the kids early so they could have some time before everyone got there.  It was very hard for Caitlyn to see grandma. She misses her so much.

Caitlyn made this bracelet for her and grandma.  She remembers grandma helping us plant tulips at our old house, so she made them each a tulip bracelet.  She has so many wonderful memories with her. She wanted grandma to be buried with her bracelet and Caitlyn wears hers every day. This bracelet will always be special to her. 

Gary and Kyle flew in Wednesday. Here they are with Lindy.

Wyatt didn't want to look at my mom's body so he was there, but avoided getting close. 

Hallee, Tessa and Caitlyn.

Tiff, Damon and Tessa.

Mel and her kids.

Dad, Matt, Lori and Elena.

Poor Alexys, she is so young to have lost two moms.  Mom did so much for her and Alexys knows it and appreciates it so much.  When Jen died Alexys didn't talk in front of people at all.  Mom worked so hard with her and took her to counseling and activities to help her gain confidence and come out of her shell.  Mom devoted so much love and attention to Dante and Alexys while she was grieving the loss of her own daughter.

There were a ton of people at the viewing. So many people love mom and dad. I think it helped dad a lot to see all of the support and love. It helped me too.  I was surprised how much it lifted me to talk to old friends and neighbors about our mutual love for mom. 

I'm amazed at my dad's strength.  He misses mom terribly, but he is still able to smile and be there for his family.  Caitlyn loves her grandpa!

It was fun to see Judy. Karrie and Brie, Adam and Emilee, Allison and Michelle Preston all came to support me. It meant so much to me that they all came. 

Katie and Ben came and stayed at the viewing. Hallee loved holding Quincy and I was glad I got to hold him at the end. Ben was so nice and went and got us food after asking the kids if they were hungry. Katie and Ben are always so generous. 

Caitlyn loved talking to Shelley and Wendy.

She loved getting to know Wendy better.

Dave and Wendy showed us lots of pictures of Brian, Josh's son.

Lori helped the kids practice their song for the funeral.  They sang "Peace in Christ" and Lindy played the piano. 

When it was over everyone who wanted to helped carry mom out to the car.

It was hard to watch them close the casket.

The next morning we had another viewing.  Caitlyn was really struggling.

Grandpa was worried about her and hugged her and comforted her.  He told her that he knew it was hard, but we needed to let grandma go.  It helped Caitlyn a lot.

Damon is the sweetest boy ever.  He came up to me while I was crying and said, "You look like you need a hug."  He also hugged Caitlyn when she was crying and told us he was here if we needed any more hugs.  He is so special and brings so much peace and happiness everywhere he goes. 

Rockwell's friend from his ward died by suicide the day of mom's viewing. We were all so worried about him and their whole family and all they were dealing with. 

I was so impressed that dad went right over to Rockwell to comfort him.   Grandpa loves Rockwell so much and wanted to comfort him.  I'm amazed by my dad's strength. Dad also called Sandi after mom died to make sure she knew that we knew she loved mom and she needed to be home with her family instead of coming to the funeral.  She has been feeling guilty that she hasn't been able to come see mom because Heidi and Zach are so sick and dad wanted to make sure she knew that she shouldn't be feeling guilty.  That meant so much to Sandi and was such a great example of how thoughtful and charitable dad is. 

I'm so grateful for my family.  

We have the best, most supportive family.  We all love each other so much and bring so much strength and comfort to each other.

Jonah was able to call during the family prayer.  My dad gave a beautiful prayer expressing gratitude for the wonderful wife, mother, grandmother, sister and daughter that mom was. One of the things I remember him saying is "put her to work, she's been sitting around long enough." Poor mom, she never sat still and was forced to sit still and lay in her bed for months.  

We all said our final goodbyes.

Ron saying goodbye.

Pam, Wendy, Shelley.

I love this picture of grandpa and Tessa. 

Me, Tiff and Mel placed the veil on mom's head and then they shut the casket. It was so hard to watch that casket close.